Motives

Motives. I often feel like I have to explain my motives for the decisions I make, and the actions I follow through with (or do not follow through with).
I often feel like I am being watched and judged by my every move. I know- silly and a little vain right. I feel that I need to explain myself and make people understand and see that I am living a life where I try my very best to make the best, most fair, and most beneficial choices in my life.
The point is, I really do care what people think and feel about me. I worry about this. I try by my own power to get others to see the good in me, and not the bad.

I feel as though God is teaching me that the decisions I make are between God, my husband and I, and my motives are judged justly by the One and Only Christ Jesus. He is guiding me to make a change in my whole decision making process and certainly in my day to day, minute to minute actions and in-actions. He is teaching me that my reliance, faith and obedience to God should be causing me to act the way I do and make the decisions that I make in my daily life.

It continues to be my hope that my friends and family will see me through the grace filled eyes of our Lord Jesus Christ, and that I myself can find comfort in His truth.
I fail daily, I disappoint daily, and I can never live up to the expectations I have set up for myself. Despite my many faults, God's truth to me is that I must be obedient to His will and words for my life and He will take care of the rest.
If I live for Christ, and even when I make mistakes, I don't have to "explain" my life, my choices or my decisions to anyone else for the sake of convincing them that I am a good person or so they can see my "thought process" of this decision. I will listen for God's direction when I make mistakes and be obedient to His direction for me.
I believe the truth of this statement in the Psalms; 115:3 (one of my favorite verses) "Our God is in heaven and does whatever pleases Him". If I am obedient to God, He will do whatever he pleases, and He is in control.
My prayer for today is that this truth would sink in to my soul deeper than the lie that I have to explain myself to others in order for them to see my true and pure motives. God, draw me closer to You, for Your glory!