As, I stated in my last post, I had a lovely, quiet few days in the hospital.
I did have some visitors. My husband and kids came back to visit me again in between Thanksgiving celebrations, and they did bring me some food :-)
I also had a sweet friend bring me a homemade piece of Pumpkin Pie (I am pretty sure that was my favorite part of being in the hospital on Thanksgiving). Thanks Friend!!!
My grandparents and parents also came to visit.
I don't know if I had mentioned this previously in my posts, but the biological mom of the babies and I share an aunt and uncle. That aunt and uncle and 2 of my cousins came to visit me, and the babies. I was also blessed with a visit from the mom's other aunt and her sister.
On Friday (the day after Thanksgiving), I was very blessed to have the opportunity to go to the nursery and see and even hold both of those adorable baby boys, and chat with their mommy and daddy. I really didn't want to go to the nursery by myself, and it worked out that another friend of mine was coming to visit me at the same time, so she and I both went down to the nursery and I was able to share a little part of my joy in this experience with her.
When entering the nursery, I was able to meet the grandpa of the new babies and he gave me a hug. He is a sweet, gentle man and I just love that he is so happy and proud of his new grand-babies. Those boys have so many people who love them and that makes my heart smile!
It was nice to see and hold the babies. The mom was telling me that "baby B" (the baby that was on top in my tummy- they were laying bunk bed style), was quite a mover and "baby A" was more relaxed. That was funny to hear, because "baby B" was quite a kicker and NEVER stopped moving and kicking me in the ribs, so I bet he will be pretty active for his whole life :-) Also, I did not feel "baby A" quite as much and often had to sit very still in order to feel him move at all. Makes sense that he might be a tad calmer. It is special to me that I was able to "feel" their personalities and that it matches what the mom is experiencing about them too.
The babies are about 2 months old now, and doing great! I have had some contact with their mommy, and she has been gracious enough to tell me how they are doing. I can tell that she is overjoyed to be their mother, and that is my favorite part of this whole experience.
The parents brought the babies over to my house to visit me a few weeks ago. They are getting so big, and they were sleeping so peacefully for the whole visit :-)
I don't know how much I will hear about the boys, but we are "connected" by family and I am sure I will hear bits and pieces about their lives.
My prayer for the boys and their family is that they grow healthy and happy at home with their wonderful parents. I pray that they would grow to love Jesus and be shown much love, and get lots and lots of snuggles from those who love them! They are in fact, truly gifts from God and a huge blessing to all of us.
Although these boys were only with me for 35 weeks and 4 days, this experience has forever changed me, and how much I value my kiddos, my family, my relationships and my God, who made this experience unfold according to his almighty will. How great Thou art!
Saturday, January 26, 2013
Continued Gestational Carrier Story (2)
Let me continue from my last blog post...
My contractions were stopped and I was able to call my husband and the biological parents of the babies so they could get to the hospital in time for their new arrivals.
The doctor had come into the room right after my water broke and told me they were aiming for a C-section in 1/2 hour, and the biological parents lived about a half and hour from the hospital. My husband and I live very close to the hospital, and my parents live just a few blocks from us, so they came to be at the house with our kids and Eric was able to get to the hospital to be with my very quickly.
The time between my water breaking and my husband getting to the hospital was all sort of a blur. There were many nurses coming in and out, and talking to me about what was going to be happening next and my doctor came in and out of the room to talk with me a few times. I just can't even remember all of the people coming in and out of the room, or what they all said.
I do remember that after my husband was there and dressed in the scrubs he had to wear in the OR, the doctor came in and asked my husband to call the parents and, see if they were close, because she said we needed to bring me to the OR. He called, and luckily, they were walking down the hall to our room at that moment! I think they must have sped a little :-)
I was then wheeled to the OR and moved to the OR bed. I am sure the doctor's were telling me lots of things that I should have been paying attention to, but the only things going through my mind were 1. Praying for the babies to be healthy, and 2. Praying that I would be ok and not feel any of the cutting (eek- I was so nervous about that).
After I received the medication to ensure I wouldn't feel anything, I was given an oxygen mask and they strapped my arms out to the side of me (I did not like that- it made my shoulders and back hurt).
Then, with Eric at my head, and the biological parents standing in the open doorway of the OR, I guess they began the C-section. I say "I guess", because I did not know they actually started. I was so consumed in my prayers and worry, that I did not realize things would go so quickly.
I remember asking Eric if they had started yet, and he said, " yes, I think they are taking the first baby out now". WOW! I was surprised and filled with suspense. I could also see the parents standing in the doorway on my left side and when I looked over at them, the mom was standing in front of the dad and she had her hands up covering her mouth and looked both nervous and excited. All I could do was just keep praying that her babies were healthy. I listened to the doctor as I heard her announce that the first baby was a... BOY! The doctor handed the baby to a nurse who took and wrapped him up and handed him to his mama! I don't remember hearing him cry, but the mom brought him over to me and showed him to me. She said, with a smile, "His name is William, I think" (Later she told me that she said "I think" because they didn't know what the other babies gender was yet so she was not positive that was his "final name".
The doctor then announced the other baby was a... BOY! I don't remember him being brought over to me, or him crying.
Both of the babies were healthy though and were able to be held right away. I was SOOOOOO... relieved! That is all I wanted for the parents and their kiddos. I just wanted them to be a happy, healthy family! That made my heart so happy!
Well, I was still on the operating table and I don't remember all the details, but I do remember that my neck, chest and back were so tight I could hardly breathe. I had to have Eric rub my shoulders so hard to help relieve the pain and help me breathe. It was terrible not being able to move my arms during this.
I overheard that doctor tell the a nurse to get the blood that they had ready for me. She also told the nurse to go have more "sent up". The doctor also leaned over the top of the curtain that was draped in front of me and told me that I needed a blood transfusion. She was very soft and calm when she spoke and I just remember not being too alarmed at this announcement. I could feel God's presence with me and could feel that things were going to be ok.
After that business was done, I was taken back to my room and I believe I fell asleep. I remember waking up a short time later to a nurse in the room, and Eric was also still there, but falling asleep in the chair. I told Eric he should go home so my parents could go back home. After all, it was Thanksgiving and I know my mom had a lot to do in the morning and I knew that she would be tired after having to get up and go to be with my kids in the middle of the night.
The next morning, my husband brought my kids to see me at the hospital (on their way to celebrate Thanksgiving with both of our families), and my 3 year old son saw me and the first thing he said was, " Are the babies out of your tummy?". "Yes", I said. He continued, to ask in excitement, "Can you chase me now?". -- If he only knew how excited I was to be so much closer to being able to chase him again! I couldn't wait until I was fully healed and ready to run after that sweet little boy!
My family left, and I spent a lovely, quiet next few days in the hospital.
This post is getting long! I will continue again on the next blog...
My contractions were stopped and I was able to call my husband and the biological parents of the babies so they could get to the hospital in time for their new arrivals.
The doctor had come into the room right after my water broke and told me they were aiming for a C-section in 1/2 hour, and the biological parents lived about a half and hour from the hospital. My husband and I live very close to the hospital, and my parents live just a few blocks from us, so they came to be at the house with our kids and Eric was able to get to the hospital to be with my very quickly.
The time between my water breaking and my husband getting to the hospital was all sort of a blur. There were many nurses coming in and out, and talking to me about what was going to be happening next and my doctor came in and out of the room to talk with me a few times. I just can't even remember all of the people coming in and out of the room, or what they all said.
I do remember that after my husband was there and dressed in the scrubs he had to wear in the OR, the doctor came in and asked my husband to call the parents and, see if they were close, because she said we needed to bring me to the OR. He called, and luckily, they were walking down the hall to our room at that moment! I think they must have sped a little :-)
I was then wheeled to the OR and moved to the OR bed. I am sure the doctor's were telling me lots of things that I should have been paying attention to, but the only things going through my mind were 1. Praying for the babies to be healthy, and 2. Praying that I would be ok and not feel any of the cutting (eek- I was so nervous about that).
After I received the medication to ensure I wouldn't feel anything, I was given an oxygen mask and they strapped my arms out to the side of me (I did not like that- it made my shoulders and back hurt).
Then, with Eric at my head, and the biological parents standing in the open doorway of the OR, I guess they began the C-section. I say "I guess", because I did not know they actually started. I was so consumed in my prayers and worry, that I did not realize things would go so quickly.
I remember asking Eric if they had started yet, and he said, " yes, I think they are taking the first baby out now". WOW! I was surprised and filled with suspense. I could also see the parents standing in the doorway on my left side and when I looked over at them, the mom was standing in front of the dad and she had her hands up covering her mouth and looked both nervous and excited. All I could do was just keep praying that her babies were healthy. I listened to the doctor as I heard her announce that the first baby was a... BOY! The doctor handed the baby to a nurse who took and wrapped him up and handed him to his mama! I don't remember hearing him cry, but the mom brought him over to me and showed him to me. She said, with a smile, "His name is William, I think" (Later she told me that she said "I think" because they didn't know what the other babies gender was yet so she was not positive that was his "final name".
The doctor then announced the other baby was a... BOY! I don't remember him being brought over to me, or him crying.
Both of the babies were healthy though and were able to be held right away. I was SOOOOOO... relieved! That is all I wanted for the parents and their kiddos. I just wanted them to be a happy, healthy family! That made my heart so happy!
Well, I was still on the operating table and I don't remember all the details, but I do remember that my neck, chest and back were so tight I could hardly breathe. I had to have Eric rub my shoulders so hard to help relieve the pain and help me breathe. It was terrible not being able to move my arms during this.
I overheard that doctor tell the a nurse to get the blood that they had ready for me. She also told the nurse to go have more "sent up". The doctor also leaned over the top of the curtain that was draped in front of me and told me that I needed a blood transfusion. She was very soft and calm when she spoke and I just remember not being too alarmed at this announcement. I could feel God's presence with me and could feel that things were going to be ok.
After that business was done, I was taken back to my room and I believe I fell asleep. I remember waking up a short time later to a nurse in the room, and Eric was also still there, but falling asleep in the chair. I told Eric he should go home so my parents could go back home. After all, it was Thanksgiving and I know my mom had a lot to do in the morning and I knew that she would be tired after having to get up and go to be with my kids in the middle of the night.
The next morning, my husband brought my kids to see me at the hospital (on their way to celebrate Thanksgiving with both of our families), and my 3 year old son saw me and the first thing he said was, " Are the babies out of your tummy?". "Yes", I said. He continued, to ask in excitement, "Can you chase me now?". -- If he only knew how excited I was to be so much closer to being able to chase him again! I couldn't wait until I was fully healed and ready to run after that sweet little boy!
My family left, and I spent a lovely, quiet next few days in the hospital.
This post is getting long! I will continue again on the next blog...
Wednesday, January 23, 2013
My Gestational Carrier experience - in a nutshell :-)
I had a wonderful opportunity this past year to help a couple achieve their goal of having children. I was able to serve them as a gestational carrier of their babies.
This was a very difficult and physically challenging journey, but also one of the most amazing and rewarding experiences I have had in my lifetime. I delivered (via C-section) two healthy baby boys on Thanksgiving morning of 2012. They were born at 35 weeks and 4 days and were very healthy weights and are doing well and their mommy and daddy are so happy and in love with their babies.
I am so happy that I could play a part in helping them all come together.
God has blessed me and my family by allowing me to have a healthy enough body to carry 2 babies.
There were (many) days and months during this pregnancy that were extremely difficult for me, both emotionally and physically. I am 5 feet tall and don't have a lot of room for 2 babies to grow, and carrying these babies took every last ounce of strength I had, just to walk a few steps, or get up from sitting down. I could not even reach my feet to put on my socks the last couple months of pregnancy (my poor children had to help me) :-)
I have 3 young children of my own, and the fact that I was carrying these two babies and could not move easily, meant that I was not able to care for them the same way I did prior to pregnancy. I could not lift them, I could not chase them or even play as "normal". I did get down on the floor and play with them and read to them, but it was painful for me and did not happen as much as I would have liked.
During this time, I really missed my kids. I missed the snuggles, I missed chasing them and carrying them in my arms. This was very difficult for me emotionally at the end.
Another aspect that was the most difficult, was that during the night time, I had to go to the bathroom to go potty (urgently) every hour. I felt so happy and almost refreshed if my body would let me go more than an hour without waking up and having to "waddle" to the toilet. For this reason, I was super tired every day, less patient then normal, had even less energy to do anything, and was sore all over.
I remember praying often that God would carry me through one day at a time and keep the babies and myself safe and guard the precious babies so they would grow healthy and strong and be able to meet their mommy and daddy in God's timing. I also remember praying very often that God would "hurry up" and grow those babies healthy enough so they could "get out" and go to their mommy and daddy, :-) so I could get back to normal life and not be uncomfortable and in pain physically.
Well, God is very good and very faithful to me, and He answered my prayers in His perfect timing and in a very perfect way.
I went in to the doctor on Wednesday November 21st for a regular appointment and stress test and told the doctor that I just did not feel well. The doctor told me that physically everything was fine and that I was only dialated to 1cm. She also said to call her if I didn't feel well later, because she was on-call at the hospital that night and I could come in and get checked out again if things didn't improve.
So, later on that evening, I was still just "not feeling right", and I went into the hospital. They checked me over and again said things were fine, and gave me some medications for sleeping. I was not having any contractions and had just had an ultrasound and learned that the babies were still breach in position. I had contacted the babies parents to tell them that I was going into the hospital to get checked out, but that they should stay home and not worry and I would call them if I learned anything important. I was convinced however, that I would be going home in the morning after I slept the night.
Well... I was wrong. I closed my eyes to get some rest and then... MY WATER BROKE!!!
So, I pushed the button to call the nurse and told her "I think my water just broke". She agreed, and immediately the room was flooded with nurses and the doctor.
The doctor said, call the parents, we are doing a C-section in a half an hour. I started to have very strong contractions and was given some medications to stop them and prepped for the procedure.
Whew... it is late, and I have to get some sleep, but I will finish this story on the next blog :-)
This was a very difficult and physically challenging journey, but also one of the most amazing and rewarding experiences I have had in my lifetime. I delivered (via C-section) two healthy baby boys on Thanksgiving morning of 2012. They were born at 35 weeks and 4 days and were very healthy weights and are doing well and their mommy and daddy are so happy and in love with their babies.
I am so happy that I could play a part in helping them all come together.
God has blessed me and my family by allowing me to have a healthy enough body to carry 2 babies.
There were (many) days and months during this pregnancy that were extremely difficult for me, both emotionally and physically. I am 5 feet tall and don't have a lot of room for 2 babies to grow, and carrying these babies took every last ounce of strength I had, just to walk a few steps, or get up from sitting down. I could not even reach my feet to put on my socks the last couple months of pregnancy (my poor children had to help me) :-)
I have 3 young children of my own, and the fact that I was carrying these two babies and could not move easily, meant that I was not able to care for them the same way I did prior to pregnancy. I could not lift them, I could not chase them or even play as "normal". I did get down on the floor and play with them and read to them, but it was painful for me and did not happen as much as I would have liked.
During this time, I really missed my kids. I missed the snuggles, I missed chasing them and carrying them in my arms. This was very difficult for me emotionally at the end.
Another aspect that was the most difficult, was that during the night time, I had to go to the bathroom to go potty (urgently) every hour. I felt so happy and almost refreshed if my body would let me go more than an hour without waking up and having to "waddle" to the toilet. For this reason, I was super tired every day, less patient then normal, had even less energy to do anything, and was sore all over.
I remember praying often that God would carry me through one day at a time and keep the babies and myself safe and guard the precious babies so they would grow healthy and strong and be able to meet their mommy and daddy in God's timing. I also remember praying very often that God would "hurry up" and grow those babies healthy enough so they could "get out" and go to their mommy and daddy, :-) so I could get back to normal life and not be uncomfortable and in pain physically.
Well, God is very good and very faithful to me, and He answered my prayers in His perfect timing and in a very perfect way.
I went in to the doctor on Wednesday November 21st for a regular appointment and stress test and told the doctor that I just did not feel well. The doctor told me that physically everything was fine and that I was only dialated to 1cm. She also said to call her if I didn't feel well later, because she was on-call at the hospital that night and I could come in and get checked out again if things didn't improve.
So, later on that evening, I was still just "not feeling right", and I went into the hospital. They checked me over and again said things were fine, and gave me some medications for sleeping. I was not having any contractions and had just had an ultrasound and learned that the babies were still breach in position. I had contacted the babies parents to tell them that I was going into the hospital to get checked out, but that they should stay home and not worry and I would call them if I learned anything important. I was convinced however, that I would be going home in the morning after I slept the night.
Well... I was wrong. I closed my eyes to get some rest and then... MY WATER BROKE!!!
So, I pushed the button to call the nurse and told her "I think my water just broke". She agreed, and immediately the room was flooded with nurses and the doctor.
The doctor said, call the parents, we are doing a C-section in a half an hour. I started to have very strong contractions and was given some medications to stop them and prepped for the procedure.
Whew... it is late, and I have to get some sleep, but I will finish this story on the next blog :-)
Friday, May 4, 2012
Creation Science
For the last two nights, my husband and I have been watching a recorded seminar of Ken Hovind regarding creation science and evolution. The seminar is called "The age of the Earth", and in the video he disproves evolutionist's theories and proves the creation theory in every circumstance.
During the process of proving creation science, he also points out the false teachings in school text books from all over the US and the world. Although he gets to be slightly "cheesy" in his presentation, I believe he speaks the Truth and I would highly recommend this educational seminar. The basic point of his seminar is that the universe shows us in every way possible that the earth is not millions or billions of years old like the texts books want you to believe. Dr. Hovind speaks of everything from the proven scientific age of the Sahara dessert, and the fact that it is growing larger; to the fact that the moon is moving away from the earth, which would prove that if the earth was as old as the evolution scientists want us to believe, then the moon would have been touching the earth long before the earth began.
I am truly amazed at all of the scientific evidence that points to the Real Truth, and I am ashamed to admit that I have not given this issue much thought before now.
It is my opinion that those who believe in evolution do so, because "someone once told them to", and gave them what seemed to be "convincing evidence". I don't want to believe something because "someone once told me to". I want to believe the Truth, because it is in God's word, but I also want to learn what I can from Ken Hovind and others like him who are finding the "worldy scientific" reasons that back up what God tells us in His word.
I want my kids to be prepared also for their encounters with those who believe in evolution. I want them to know the truth and what the real proven science is behind creation science.
Please don't just believe because "some teacher or guy told you to". Listen and obey God and let Him lead you to the Truth.
Websites For Facts: Answers in Genesis, and Creation Today
During the process of proving creation science, he also points out the false teachings in school text books from all over the US and the world. Although he gets to be slightly "cheesy" in his presentation, I believe he speaks the Truth and I would highly recommend this educational seminar. The basic point of his seminar is that the universe shows us in every way possible that the earth is not millions or billions of years old like the texts books want you to believe. Dr. Hovind speaks of everything from the proven scientific age of the Sahara dessert, and the fact that it is growing larger; to the fact that the moon is moving away from the earth, which would prove that if the earth was as old as the evolution scientists want us to believe, then the moon would have been touching the earth long before the earth began.
I am truly amazed at all of the scientific evidence that points to the Real Truth, and I am ashamed to admit that I have not given this issue much thought before now.
It is my opinion that those who believe in evolution do so, because "someone once told them to", and gave them what seemed to be "convincing evidence". I don't want to believe something because "someone once told me to". I want to believe the Truth, because it is in God's word, but I also want to learn what I can from Ken Hovind and others like him who are finding the "worldy scientific" reasons that back up what God tells us in His word.
I want my kids to be prepared also for their encounters with those who believe in evolution. I want them to know the truth and what the real proven science is behind creation science.
Please don't just believe because "some teacher or guy told you to". Listen and obey God and let Him lead you to the Truth.
Websites For Facts: Answers in Genesis, and Creation Today
Thursday, April 26, 2012
Motives
Motives. I often feel like I have to explain my motives for the decisions I make, and the actions I follow through with (or do not follow through with).
I often feel like I am being watched and judged by my every move. I know- silly and a little vain right. I feel that I need to explain myself and make people understand and see that I am living a life where I try my very best to make the best, most fair, and most beneficial choices in my life.
The point is, I really do care what people think and feel about me. I worry about this. I try by my own power to get others to see the good in me, and not the bad.
I feel as though God is teaching me that the decisions I make are between God, my husband and I, and my motives are judged justly by the One and Only Christ Jesus. He is guiding me to make a change in my whole decision making process and certainly in my day to day, minute to minute actions and in-actions. He is teaching me that my reliance, faith and obedience to God should be causing me to act the way I do and make the decisions that I make in my daily life.
It continues to be my hope that my friends and family will see me through the grace filled eyes of our Lord Jesus Christ, and that I myself can find comfort in His truth.
I fail daily, I disappoint daily, and I can never live up to the expectations I have set up for myself. Despite my many faults, God's truth to me is that I must be obedient to His will and words for my life and He will take care of the rest.
If I live for Christ, and even when I make mistakes, I don't have to "explain" my life, my choices or my decisions to anyone else for the sake of convincing them that I am a good person or so they can see my "thought process" of this decision. I will listen for God's direction when I make mistakes and be obedient to His direction for me.
I believe the truth of this statement in the Psalms; 115:3 (one of my favorite verses) "Our God is in heaven and does whatever pleases Him". If I am obedient to God, He will do whatever he pleases, and He is in control.
My prayer for today is that this truth would sink in to my soul deeper than the lie that I have to explain myself to others in order for them to see my true and pure motives. God, draw me closer to You, for Your glory!
I often feel like I am being watched and judged by my every move. I know- silly and a little vain right. I feel that I need to explain myself and make people understand and see that I am living a life where I try my very best to make the best, most fair, and most beneficial choices in my life.
The point is, I really do care what people think and feel about me. I worry about this. I try by my own power to get others to see the good in me, and not the bad.
I feel as though God is teaching me that the decisions I make are between God, my husband and I, and my motives are judged justly by the One and Only Christ Jesus. He is guiding me to make a change in my whole decision making process and certainly in my day to day, minute to minute actions and in-actions. He is teaching me that my reliance, faith and obedience to God should be causing me to act the way I do and make the decisions that I make in my daily life.
It continues to be my hope that my friends and family will see me through the grace filled eyes of our Lord Jesus Christ, and that I myself can find comfort in His truth.
I fail daily, I disappoint daily, and I can never live up to the expectations I have set up for myself. Despite my many faults, God's truth to me is that I must be obedient to His will and words for my life and He will take care of the rest.
If I live for Christ, and even when I make mistakes, I don't have to "explain" my life, my choices or my decisions to anyone else for the sake of convincing them that I am a good person or so they can see my "thought process" of this decision. I will listen for God's direction when I make mistakes and be obedient to His direction for me.
I believe the truth of this statement in the Psalms; 115:3 (one of my favorite verses) "Our God is in heaven and does whatever pleases Him". If I am obedient to God, He will do whatever he pleases, and He is in control.
My prayer for today is that this truth would sink in to my soul deeper than the lie that I have to explain myself to others in order for them to see my true and pure motives. God, draw me closer to You, for Your glory!
Friday, April 20, 2012
Frugal living?
I have always known that my husband is frugal. He will go out of his way (literally) to get the best price on anything from peanut butter to a new TV. He is constantly checking on our bank accounts, tracking our spending, and thinking of ways we can save more, pay off our debts faster and retire early.
Well, I am the total opposite! I do not want to go out of my way to save a few dollars, I like the convenience of stores that are close and getting things done quickly. I have glanced at our on-line bank statements a few times during our almost 8 years of marriage, and I always assume that there is money in there that I can spend.
I have learned that if I want to buy something and I don't think it is a large enough purchase to ask my husband about it first, I use the only real method that keeps me out of "trouble". I smile and nice smile and I say "oops". :-) Sometimes I get a sigh, and sometimes I get a hug and sometimes I do get a small lecture about spending habits... but life goes on, and we are not too worried about our financial situation.
Most of the time when I am buying things, I tend to justify it by the fact that I do not often buy clothes, jewery, or other things for myself or the household, and when I do, I get them at a consignment store, or only buy one towel at a time, when I know we really could use 3 or 4 new ones to replace our old tattered and torn ones.
I feel that our spending downfalls tend to be related to eating out, impulse buys that we don't really need (like the little toys we get for the kids every once in a while at the store), and outings we go on.
My hang up right now with the issue of living frugally is that it is my desire to live a frugal life and to be debt free with savings and the ability to pay cash for what we buy. However, I look forward to the day when I can go and buy some new clothes from a non-consignment store, and even some new shoes (maybe on the same day or in the same month) :-) , and not have to worry about telling my husband how much the clothes cost. I also want to be able to sign my children up for a sport or activity without thinking it costs too much.
It is hard for me to see how I can do these things if I start trying to live more frugally.
It feels like I am starting to see how both of my "dreams" in regards to finances can become a reality for us, but it might be a bumpy road to get me all the way on board. :-)
I will work on it though.
Well, I am the total opposite! I do not want to go out of my way to save a few dollars, I like the convenience of stores that are close and getting things done quickly. I have glanced at our on-line bank statements a few times during our almost 8 years of marriage, and I always assume that there is money in there that I can spend.
I have learned that if I want to buy something and I don't think it is a large enough purchase to ask my husband about it first, I use the only real method that keeps me out of "trouble". I smile and nice smile and I say "oops". :-) Sometimes I get a sigh, and sometimes I get a hug and sometimes I do get a small lecture about spending habits... but life goes on, and we are not too worried about our financial situation.
Most of the time when I am buying things, I tend to justify it by the fact that I do not often buy clothes, jewery, or other things for myself or the household, and when I do, I get them at a consignment store, or only buy one towel at a time, when I know we really could use 3 or 4 new ones to replace our old tattered and torn ones.
I feel that our spending downfalls tend to be related to eating out, impulse buys that we don't really need (like the little toys we get for the kids every once in a while at the store), and outings we go on.
My hang up right now with the issue of living frugally is that it is my desire to live a frugal life and to be debt free with savings and the ability to pay cash for what we buy. However, I look forward to the day when I can go and buy some new clothes from a non-consignment store, and even some new shoes (maybe on the same day or in the same month) :-) , and not have to worry about telling my husband how much the clothes cost. I also want to be able to sign my children up for a sport or activity without thinking it costs too much.
It is hard for me to see how I can do these things if I start trying to live more frugally.
It feels like I am starting to see how both of my "dreams" in regards to finances can become a reality for us, but it might be a bumpy road to get me all the way on board. :-)
I will work on it though.
Thursday, April 12, 2012
Personal time vs housework
I love "all things neat". I must admit I am obsessed with keeping things neat, clean, put away, in their own place/bin/box or space in a room. I am bothered by everything from fingerprints on windows, dirty screens, film on the shower doors to toys being put away in the wrong bin and toys, puzzles or games missing pieces.
Ugh! There you go.
I bet you think my house is super clean and neat now don't you? The ugly truth is, it is not clean, there are leaf bits on my kitchen floor and currently there is unfolded laundry all over my living room floor.
My screens are not all clean, the toys are mostly put away (but it was a really nice day outside and the kids played outside for much of it), there are lots of fingerprints on my windows, and sadly even finger or maybe tongue smears :-( Ick!
So, most days I stress about having the time to clean the smears, fold the laundry, clean the floors, and let's not forget about the toilets!
Well, the Lord gave me a nudge today. I believe that my focus needs to be on caring for my children and the children I do daycare for first, and making sure they get the attention and affection that they need. I also believe that the Lord wants me to work hard to keep our home clean and tidy, because it is His blessing to us to live where we live.
I realize through the nudge I was given that my focus is more on the tasks then on the family. I often become hurried in my time with the children so I can get to the "work" that I have to do. I do not want to be too busy for my kids or my husband.
My prayer and goal for the rest of this week and the next is to find at least 10 minutes of personal one on one time with each of my children (above and beyond play all together times) to give them all time to see that I love and cherish them and they are more important to me than housework.
I have found in some instances I can do things together with the kids. For example, my son really enjoys "helping" do the dishes. Yes, it takes longer and it gets a little messier :-) But this is time that we can both feel love, time spent together and a sense of accomplishment.
I hope to take the time to do more "tasks" alongside my children, not only to teach them about responsibility and doing their part in a family setting, but also to simply be with them.
Ugh! There you go.
I bet you think my house is super clean and neat now don't you? The ugly truth is, it is not clean, there are leaf bits on my kitchen floor and currently there is unfolded laundry all over my living room floor.
My screens are not all clean, the toys are mostly put away (but it was a really nice day outside and the kids played outside for much of it), there are lots of fingerprints on my windows, and sadly even finger or maybe tongue smears :-( Ick!
So, most days I stress about having the time to clean the smears, fold the laundry, clean the floors, and let's not forget about the toilets!
Well, the Lord gave me a nudge today. I believe that my focus needs to be on caring for my children and the children I do daycare for first, and making sure they get the attention and affection that they need. I also believe that the Lord wants me to work hard to keep our home clean and tidy, because it is His blessing to us to live where we live.
I realize through the nudge I was given that my focus is more on the tasks then on the family. I often become hurried in my time with the children so I can get to the "work" that I have to do. I do not want to be too busy for my kids or my husband.
My prayer and goal for the rest of this week and the next is to find at least 10 minutes of personal one on one time with each of my children (above and beyond play all together times) to give them all time to see that I love and cherish them and they are more important to me than housework.
I have found in some instances I can do things together with the kids. For example, my son really enjoys "helping" do the dishes. Yes, it takes longer and it gets a little messier :-) But this is time that we can both feel love, time spent together and a sense of accomplishment.
I hope to take the time to do more "tasks" alongside my children, not only to teach them about responsibility and doing their part in a family setting, but also to simply be with them.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)